If I Had a Magic Wand...

I run a group called "Artistic Women Inspiring Artistic Women" and we meet once a month. It is an amazing group of women and the synergy and inspiration I get from every meeting is priceless. This month I have a wonderful lady coming who is a hypnotherapist, she is going to do a guided visualization with us and then a short one on one session with one of the participants. I am intrigued, although I know nothing about the area of hypnotherapy. Accessing the mind and the different areas of the mind, logical and creative, to me is extremely creative.

The last few days I have been pondering the question

"If I could wave a magic wand and have whatever I wanted around pure indulgence and red wine, what would I want?"

It is easy to answer what you want if we are talking about dinner or what to wear, well most of the time anyway. What kind of car we want or purchasing a home might take us a little longer to decide but it is a tangible thing that eventually we can clearly state and therefore find, or find something close to our specifications and choose to make some compromises. The intangibles, the things we cannot touch, taste or smell are a little trickier.

When I work with clients the first thing we do at the top of the call is define "What do you want to focus on today?" Sometimes we may spend almost the whole call exploring and answering this question while others the clients comes ready to answer it immediately. In life knowing what we want is key for us to attaining it. If we cannot wrap our arms, or at least our head around what we want how d0 we know where to find it? How do we know when we have found or attain it?

In my quest for pure indulgence is red wine part of the equation? If so in what capacity? I defiantly see the see-saw of wine and pure indulgence, it is a delicate balance. Too much red wine send the see-saw up in the air squishing pure indulgence. Does too much pure indulgence send the see-saw in the other direction squishing red wine? I think it does, but is that what I want?

If I had a magic wand and Melany the hypnotherapist could wave it what would I want?

• Never to touch red wine again?
• No more than two glasses at one time?
• I might want to use the standard set in the clean sweep program of 2 glasses per week.
• Not while watching TV
• Only enjoying for it's own sake, being mindful and not doing anything at all while I enjoy it?
• Only when I go out?
• Never before 8:30 PM?

Or would my wish for the magic wand be around what I do want?

• In bed by 10:30 PM
• Meditate every night at 8 PM
• Have a cup of herbal tea every night before I go to bed
• Start my bedtime routine at 9 PM every night

The whole idea of getting what you want is a little scary too. By making a decision what might you miss out on? Do I truly never want to have a drink again and miss out on indulging at birthday celebrations or enjoy one glass of wine and a square of chocolate. If I never drink before 8:30 PM does that mean I never get to enjoy another champagne brunch? Actually I never have red wine at brunch so that option is looking a little more appealing. What this is all turning into now is a discussion around boundaries. What are my boundaries? Perhaps it is a combinations of wishes / boundaries that put together make the ideal situation. Maybe it's a combination of not before 8:30 PM and starting my bed time routine at 9:30 PM? The next question of course is does never mean never? If I cross that boundary what are the consequences, what situation would be OK to cross the boundaries?

A wonderful therapist I know describes boundaries as fences around our houses with a gate which we control, enabling us to let people in and out at our discretion. Perhaps in the case of addiction, did I really use that word! The problem is with the gate keeper.